Matrescence as an Awakening: The Call for Transformation
Choosing Transformation.
First and foremost - this blog is NOT clinical advice nor is it intended to minimize PMADS or maternal mental health. In fact, it is to strengthen this conversation, expand it and bring more attention to it, from all disciplines and providers who work with Mothers.
What does WOKE mean? In this context…
I know the word "woke" can spark controversy right now, but let me be clear – its roots in theory have meaning. And as I reflect on it in my journey, particularly as a mother, it all starts to make sense.
Becoming a mother, and truly being a mother, forces me to confront the world around me every single day. Not just in the choices I make about how and why I raise my children (cue feminist mothering à la Green), but also in how I see myself – my role in the world, the privileges I hold, the oppressive systems I am a part of, and how I can take responsibility to change them for the better.
This is what I believe the “woke” term is really about – it’s about awakening to a new level of consciousness. And that’s precisely why the patriarchy doesn’t like it.
Transition or Transformation?
There’s something profoundly different about becoming a mother compared to other life transitions. Becoming a mother isn’t just a transition – it’s a transformation. If we allow it to be.
In this transformation, there’s a constant tension. The "old" version of ourselves feels like it’s slipping away, but we keep pushing ourselves to hold on to it. We’re constantly battling expectations – from how we look (hello, “bounce back” culture), to feeling the need to “prove our worth” through productivity, to believing we must do it all on our own because if we fail, it’s “our problem” – not a systemic one.
At first, it’s a slow burn. But for many, there comes a sudden realization – a wake-up moment. We stop and ask ourselves:
Why is this so hard?
Is it really me?
What am I missing?
And if we’re willing to approach these questions with curiosity – not judgment – we begin to "wake up."
We start to question systems. We question norms. We question rules. We question ideologies. We question ourselves – our privilege and our role in perpetuating oppression. We question our upbringing, our mothering, and even our choices. (By the way, #gentleparenting? That’s woke – it’s a conscious choice.)
We question everything.
And through this process of questioning, the world starts to look different. And we feel a call to act differently within it.
Becoming “Woke”
Again, using the term “woke” as it pertains to theory - not to add to add to political commentary.
Some will answer this call to "wake up." Others may not.
But here’s the thing: there’s a choice. The decision to wake up or not is, for the most part, ours to make.
Waking up is disorienting. It’s scary. It’s vulnerable. It’s risky. But once you’ve woken up and seen the cycle for what it is, staying in the “status quo” feels even more catastrophic – not just for us, but for the future of humanity and the world.
Matrescence isn't just about becoming a Mother - it's also about unbecoming all you've ever been told and believed yourself to be in order to gain love, belonging and worth.And this process isn’t just for you. It’s for your children. It’s for the collective.
Choosing Different
So, now that you’ve woken up, what comes next?
This is when you choose something different for yourself. And I won’t sugarcoat it – this choice is uncomfortable. It’s sticky. It’s messy. It’s disorienting. There’s grief. There’s accountability. But the rewards are immense. When you choose the "Direction of Change," it’s not easy, but it is worth it.
It might feel risky, vulnerable, and even counter-cultural – because it is. But it’s the only way forward. This is the paradigm shift – this is the Matricentric Way.
We can’t stay theoretical anymore. Mothers need change now – in tangible, real-time ways. If knowledge is power, as this training believes, then it’s time to turn that knowledge into practice. The heart of this work is in action. And it’s about time.
Learn More and Get Involved
Professionally: The Matricentric Way is leading this paradigm shift - it truly is expanding the conversation on maternal mental health. If you are a professional that supports Mothers, I invite you to enroll in The Matricentric Way, either LIVE or self-paced. Join this movement today so that we can transform not only the lives of the individual Mothers we support, but the greater collective of Mothers.
Personally: The Becoming Mama course is available self-paced for any Mother within her first 7 or so years postpartum, interested in learning more about her matrescence AND the impact of Patriarchal Motherhood on her experience of being a Mother. (NOTE: this is NOT a substitute for clinical therapy NOR is it recommended to treat maternal mental health challenges. Consult your therapist for any mental health concerns.)
